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Thursday, January 31, 2013

Cooking Love - Day 31

Never underestimate the therapeutic power of cooking. More specifically baking. I love finding new ideas and trying them out. I honestly don't do enough baking. My oven seems to have a mind of it's own. One day it will bake wonderfully and the next day I have burnt bottoms and mushy tops!

I spend a lot of time in my kitchen. Between cooking for meals, baking and cleaning up...it seems like most of the day is spent in there. And always at the end of the day my kitchen still looks a mess. In a perfect world it would be spotless, but I don't live in a perfect world.

I have found that cooking has helped me overcome a lot of my fears of food. Meat has always been a hurdle for me, but I married a man who loves meat..so I cook it. Now I can honestly say it doesn't bother me as much. It's also been a great way for me to introduce a healthy relationship with food to my daughters. It's something to be enjoyed and something to experiment with. We try new things, that don't always come out right, but it's the experience that counts.

I encourage you today to step out with something new. Involve your daughters (or sons) in the cooking experience. If you have a bad relationship with food, use it to help yourself mend that and teach your daughter something else. Be bold.

Day 31...
Stained Glass Cookies

Sadly the site that I got this idea from is not longer up and running. Otherwise I would send you all over there for the recipe. But really all you need is cutout cookie dough and jolly ranchers. Happy baking!
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Wednesday, January 30, 2013

Heartbeat - Day 30

My heartbeats strong for my man, but not without reason. He respects me. He honors me. He is gentle with me. He has taken time to know who I am and always approaches me in away that I will respond to. He loves me.

I wonder about the day when I talk about boys with my girls. In many ways we already have. We read books like "Princes and the Kiss" and talk about the importance of boys treating you well. We have the talks when the girls would come home from school saying "Cole said that if I marry him, he will buy me lots of things." that it's not about money and if he can buy you things. It's about if her finds your heart priceless and worth more that other things.

When one of my girls come home telling me they have found the one I plan on asking them these questions...

Does he love God?
Does he respect you?
Does he find interest in what makes you passionate?
Does he believe you are beautiful? (Even without makeup on)
Does he encourage you to be the best you?
Do you feel you can go to him with struggles you are having?
Is he honest with you?

A man who doesn't respect you, doesn't deserve you. A man who only finds interest in his own passions doesn't care about what makes you happy. A man who doesn't love how you look first thing in the morning, doesn't see your true beauty.  If the only thing he does it tear you down, he isn't worth your time. If honesty isn't his first response, don't trust him with what's most important. A man who fears and loves God is a man who will hold you up and show you the love you deserve.


This year we will celebrate 10 years of marriage. 10 years of ups and down. 10 years of travels and kids. After 10 years I can say that this man loves me and treats me with tenderness. This man is a man that loves God and respects me.

Day 30...
Heartbeat Hat




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One Day Late - Day 29

Later today I will post Day 30, but right now you get the one day late Day 29! We had a busy day of rearranging bedrooms for the girls and making room in the school room for a set of bunk beds. Sigh...it's never ending. Trying to figure out the best solution for bedrooms and nighttime. It use to be that all 5 were sleeping in the master bedroom. The master bedroom is a ridiculously large room, the even with 3 sets of bunk beds there is still room for all there clothes. The problem is that the girls mess around at bedtime a TON! They love to talk and it's almost like a sleepover every night. I have to say it's not too bad, they are mostly really good at bedtime, but lately I have just needed more peace at bedtime. My husband is working crazy hours and I need the calmness of bedtime.

So the two night owls in one room and the three early birds in the other. Last night it work out so wonderfully! It was quiet and peaceful...I can only hope that this continues. I wanted to make them something for their beds so I went about cutting hearts. Lots of tiny hearts.

Dreams are something that can haunt us or bless us. I have had my fair share of horrible dreams, but I tend to focus on the good ones. The more I think about the bad ones that more I tend to have them. Every night I end my day with reading. Sometimes the Bible other times a non fiction book. (Side note: Last time I read a fiction book before bedtime I had strange Hunger Game dreams. Never again!) I end my day with calm thoughts giving my day over to God. It's pretty much the same thing I do in my mornings. Giving over my worries and my troubles.

So I find it important to do the same thing for the girls. End it on a calm note. This doesn't always happen. Nights we have Tae Kwon Do is the worst. Since it's rush rush rush and I just need them in bed. But I start to wonder if that isn't the most important night to end it with book time and calming everyone down. Book time is such a sweet time of our day. My couch is full of little girls all wanting to sit next to me. It normally ends with as many girls on my lap as can fit and the rest huddled around me. It's ends their day ready for sweet dreams.

Day 29...
Heart Dreams

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Monday, January 28, 2013

Colorful Heart - Day 28

I missed a day, but I have a good reason. My dad slipped on the ice yesterday and broke his wrist. My mom broke her arm on Christmas Eve and Dad wouldn't let her go to the ER with him. I didn't want him to be by himself the whole time so I spent sometime with him and then went back to pick him up so he could sleep at our house last night. The roads were terrible here last night so driving to the next town where he lives wouldn't have been a good idea. 

It's so icy outside. It was disguised as just a rainy day. The road and sidewalks looked just wet, but they were as slippery and any ice I have ever seen. I think about how at times we disguise what's really going on. We feel ashamed to show it, but we have a hard time really reaching out to show that we are struggling. I think that God intended us to be people who reached out to help and be helped. He never intended to live in shame or to disguise what was going on. 

Do you see someone who is struggling? Are you struggling? I think it's time for us to reach out for both reasons. Reach out to help someone and reach out to be helped. 

Day 28...
Colorful Heart

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Saturday, January 26, 2013

My Heart Goes - Day 26

Just a quick post today. Nothing fancy just my drawing....

Day 26...
Portable Heart...


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Friday, January 25, 2013

Find Your Place - Day 25

Nothing touches me quiet the way nature does. I think that was one of the hardest things for me when we lived in Asia. The city was large and bustling which fit me perfectly, but it was lacking something I needed so desperately. Nature. It was treated with such carelessness. A tree would be planted and the next day it would be gone a large mound of dirt where it use to stand. Minds would change all the time. They didn't want it here they wanted it there. I never had a tree that would be my spot. There wasn't a rock pile that I could sit on and go through all my thoughts.

Growing up there was a rock pile on the other end of town. It was mine. It was beautiful and had the most amazing view of the river that was down below the hill. I would ride my bike down there and I would sit and get lost in my thoughts. I would think about events that happened and talk to God. It seemed as if He never talked back. But it would be years later that I would see how His voice was heart in the things around me. That place was important to me. It was void of distractions from the world and the only distraction I had was God. 

Have you encouraged your girl to find a place in nature where they can be by themselves? A place where they can sort out their thoughts? As much as I want to always be the one they turn to, I also realize that sometimes they just need to think it through. I have to remind myself though that thinking it through does not take the place of talking it through.

Day 25...
Branches Heart
I can't believe I have been doing this for 25 days now! Link up and join the fun! Anything counts!


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Thursday, January 24, 2013

Gotta Love Yourself Mama - Day 24

I was thinking yesterday about teaching my girls to really love themselves and find their worth in God. The thought kept going through my head "You can't do that until you love yourself." So true. I went for many years in my marriage and raising my girls with not fully loving myself. Constantly pointing out all my little flaws. I wasn't a good wife or mother.

It's what I thought, but it was true in a different way. All those things I thought I was doing wrong weren't the problem. What made me fail at that time was that I wasn't loving myself and I wasn't finding my wroth in the right place. I cared too much about what people thought. Cared too much about how I looked on the outside and was forgetting to take what was inside and work on that. What people thought was on the top of my list.

My heart was black. It was burnt from the past and I wasn't doing anything to put the smothering smoke to rest. I was letting it fester up feelings over and over again that I felt powerless to do anything about. These thoughts and feelings kept coming and I continued to beat myself up over them all. What changed?

It was that conversation I had with a friend about forgiveness that really got me. The fact is not forgiving myself was my biggest problem. I remember sitting by myself after this conversation thinking to myself... If I don't figure this out how will my daughters ever get it? It was at that time I change my whole thought on myself. I was loved and I would love myself. It's something I have to remind myself often.

I was helping a girl last night with verses and she had it in her head that she couldn't do it. I used the same words I say to my own girls "I believe in you, and I know that you can do it." It just took a little bit more work to help her. How often do we forget to say that to ourselves as moms? So let me take a moment to jump start you and help you. To all you moms I believe in you and I KNOW that you can do it. If we don't believe in ourselves how do we expect our daughters to believe in themselves?

Day 24...

Burnt Heart
Healing Hearts

I was sad that I missed the top of my artwork here. I had burnt the edges of it and thought it looked pretty cool. I guess I could have taken another picture, but that seemed like too much work at the moment! Today you were supose to use green items...perhaps I cheated a little? They are green matches...the tops are green!

Come back tomorrow for the LINK UP!
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Wednesday, January 23, 2013

You Complete Me - Day 23

"You complete me." is a phrase I remember saying in a goofy way and making fun of the all famous movie Jerry Maguire that I have actually never seen. Nope...not once! I just make fun of the lines. And the best is when someone will answer with "You had me at hello." How can I find this funny if I have never seen the movie? It's a friend thing! Love you my friend...you know who you are!

I never thought I would be completed. I never thought I would find one who would want to complete me. I think all women have been there at one time. Feeling unworthy of a man's love. Feeling used and broken and unable to love or be loved.

How do I help my girls not feel this way? Is it just something that is passed down and every girl must feel at some point in their lives? I hope not! I don't wish the feeling on my worse enemy. I suppose the only answer is to let them know a boy will never be the answer to being complete. You are so much more valuable than to find your completeness in some imperfect boy. Even the most Godly of men are still human. Still lacking perfection.

Finding my worth in God is what has brought me to complete. Having God as number one in my life and my husbands life has brought us together. He is what completes our love and relationship. I think Colton Dixon says it best in his song.
"When I can't find the words
To say how much it hurts
You are the healing in my heart.

When all that I can see
Are broken memories
You are the light that's in the dark."

Day 23...
Shooting Heart

My oldest named what was made today. I had 3 helpers today and I think her name for this was perfect. She says it looked like a shooting star, but it's a heart. Today we used all recycled materials.
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Tuesday, January 22, 2013

Bridge The Gap - Day 22

"You're as big as an elephant, the bridge is going to break under your weight." That's what I remember hearing and reading today's prompt brought the memory of that voice back to my mind. A voice I remember sounding so much like my own voice, but yet so foreign.

It's a voice that many people hear. Many young girls begin to hear the voice of imperfection at such a young age. The worst part is that you are tortured by the sound of your own voice. Walking trying to beat yourself up. It becomes a war within yourself that is so hard to win. A constant tug-o-war that feels as if it will never end.

It seems as if the idea to make a bridge large enough for an elephant to cross or small enough for an amoeba was a harsh reality of facing that voice once again. A voice I had once won victory over, but never thought I would have to think about again. Truth is...it's apart of me. It's where I have come from and that voice will always be apart of my story.

I have often been obsessed with bridges. There is always this thought of being trapped on one side of a ragging river with no other way to cross but a bridge. As a child I remember going to the swinging bridge in town. The fear would build up inside of me, but I didn't want anyone to think that I was afraid of crossing. As you begin to cross it begins to swing and then your brothers begin to jump on it to make it even more terrifying! A bridge makes me think of facing my fears. Doing something that I normally wouldn't. Getting to the other side even though the journey frightens me.

Bridges aren't always scary. There are those bridges that are strong and sturdy that don't swing when you cross. You make it across without thinking about falling to your death. The only thing you think about is the fact that you are going to be safer on the other side.

When I brought up this project to our oldest I said "How are we going to make a bridge large enough for an elephant?" I love the mind of a child. So innocent and so simple. She didn't even hesitate to say "Love mom! Love is a bridge big enough for an elephant!" She brings tears to my eyes. I know she's right and I love that it was her that reminded me of this.

Love. If you are lost in a world of thoughts that are grounded in reality, love is your bridge back. It may take time. It may take lots of patience. It may take lots of grace. But being there with love and understanding is a bridge that will ground a person back to thoughts of truth.

Day 22...
Bridge of Love

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Come back Friday for the weekly link up!
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Monday, January 21, 2013

10 Word Love Story - Day 21


How does red turn to white?
Your death brings life?

Unfinished Project

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Sunday, January 20, 2013

Hearts Coming Together - Day 20

I am staying on track with my creativity. Although this one isn't actually in the book, but the book gives you allowance for something like this. I couldn't pass up a picture like this one. One thing I love about my job are the couple I meet. The fact that I get to capture the love and the special moments. I love that their bodies make an unintentional heart...but this couple was so full of love. I can't wait for their wedding!



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Saturday, January 19, 2013

Float My Heart - Day 19

There she is with the hear that we made. All happy that she gets to play her part. 


There she goes willing to throw it in we I said "3" and jumping for joy!

Giggles and joy as she runs to watch as our heart goes swimming by...

Then we get to the car and tears start to flow "I wanted to keep it FOREVER!"

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Friday, January 18, 2013

I am Surrounded - Day 18

My life is full of girly things. Art projects. Paintings. Coloring pages. These things are brought home from school everyday. I love it, yet many of them get left in the car. Usually I put them on the passenger seat and they sit there for a week.

Present Given Yesterday

Every time I am given a masterpiece I give it my all excitement. All my children probably think they are a small Picasso or da Vinci by the way I show enthusiasm for what they do and give me. But I will never regret show my kids this. Letting them see that what they make and do is worth while and important to me. The Destroyer worked so hard on her masterpiece in that picture. I could have thrown it to the side and said "Oh nice." But I think about how hard she worked on it. She was at school putting all the pieces together and all the time she had me in mind. I am sure she thought "My mom is going to LOVE this!"  How disappointed would she have been if I had just thrown it to the side with hardly a word? But when I give it my attention and acknowledge the hard work she did...she lights up!

I feel like as parents sometimes we forget the importance of the little things our kids do. How we should celebrate there efforts. Building our children is up so important and will guide their future to be bright and clear.

Today's creation was made out of objects found in my car. Wasn't hard since there was lots in my car! I used one of my daughter's paintings to make these cute little things. Can you tell by the Hello Kitty sticker on my Bible that girls rule this house?

Day 18...
Paper Hearts

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Thursday, January 17, 2013

Superheroes - Day 17

I have this crazy obsession with superheroes. It's seemed to have rubbed off on my girls too. I always blame their love for superheroes on my husband and the fact that he doesn't have any boys. Truth is though...the reason my girls can tell you all about the Hulk and how he turns green with purple pants. That Spiderman was bitten by a crazy spider and that's why he's just simply cool. And they can tell you all about the Avengers...who belongs and who doesn't! It's because of me! I love a good superhero.

I think the whole idea behind superheroes really speaks to each and everyone of us. We long to have that super human come down a pick us up. Save us from the terrible villain. If all you women are honest you would admit to the fact that you have always dreamed about being spidy kissed. It speaks to that need to have someone who is bigger and stronger than us in our lives. Someone who can reach down in our darkest moments and save the day.

Sadly there is no Batman to fight off my dark nights. No Spiderman to avenge my hurts. No Captain America to save my day. So how is it that I make it another day? How is it that I make it through those tough nights and dreary days? There were days I didn't think I would make it. Days that I prayed would just end. It were those days that I would dream.

I think I realized that my fascination with superheroes was ok. It's not the idea that I actually like them...it's the fact that I don't let the reality that there is someone who can do all these things for me. He can actually do better. He can give me strength when I have none. But here's the trick...I actually had to get to a point where I admitted that I needed his help and that I couldn't do it on my own. Hardest thing I have ever done. There are days that this is still hard for me to do. But it's worth it.

Day 17...
She's a Superhero


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This was the hairdo of the day!

Heart Braid



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Wednesday, January 16, 2013

She's Loved - Day 16

After yesterday today feels just as busy. It's days like this that I just want to crash. I want to snuggle on the couch with a book or turn on a TV show. Old episodes of LOST or Life do it for me. Just sit and veg, but I have connections I need to make. I have my girl's that long for attention, they want love and if I turn myself into a couch potato for the day, they don't get that.

So I find things that are easy to do. Games we can play art projects that are fun for all of us. Today was a special day for The Emotionalist. She's our 2nd daughter and at times she takes a bit more attention. It's just her personality. She thrives with one-on-one attention. She melted today with the news that she would be helping me with the blog project!

Her heart is so tender and in need of such sweet and unconditional love. She scares me sometimes because she reminds me of me so much. I wonder if she struggles with the same things I did as a child. I hope not. Having her be emotionally like me in so many ways, at times makes it easy for me to connect with her. I know what she will respond to. At other times we are at odds. She is so much like me that we collide with so much force that I need a time out. 

Moms and dads here is a wonderful idea for you and your little ones. Are they wanting your attention? Do they love doing art, but you don't have much around the house? Go to your kitchen  and grab a potato and knife. I made a simple heart stamp by cutting the potato in half and then cutting out a heart on the end. She loved it and was stamping hearts for about an hour today!

Day 16...
Stamp A Heart

If you look closely to the picture you can see a project from a few days ago! The book has been awesome. The girls are able to really feel apart of the project since they are doing projects in the same book that I use at times. I talk about prevention a lot and here is a great idea to be on the path of prevention. Take time. Do some art. Let your kids get messy!
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Tuesday, January 15, 2013

Better Late - Day 15

Today was full. It was the busiest day I have had in weeks! School drop offs, playtime, dentist, piano lessons, zumba for the kids, 2 separate Tae Kwon Do classes...and finally bed time. With all this going on I still had time to make my little bit of creative stuff...although I became lazy and scanned it instead of taking a picture. But....

At least I am posting it! I have come to realize that it's not always about if I do something at a certain time...or the same time everyday. It's really the fact that I do it. I get it done. I have reached my goal! So here ya go.

Day 15...

Dollar Money

I actually had a really cute idea for my post today about the worth of your heart, but you will have to wait for another day for it....because this mom needs some rest!
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Monday, January 14, 2013

I'm so Small - Day 14

It's hard to explain how a little girl can feel sometimes. I've been there before, but for me to really describe it still feels so inadequate. I felt so small. Almost as if no one ever saw me. My parents loved me and cared for me, but there was still this feeling. At a young age I am not sure I would have been able to really express the feeling. I had this feeling of wanting someone to ask me that simple question..."How are you doing?"

Would I have answered truthfully? Would I have known how to answer? How many times do we answer "Fine" when asked this question? It seems to almost be ingrained in us at a young age. Don't answer truthfully, because the truth is no one really cares. The question is always asked in passing and we are told that people are too busy and too bothered with their own problems that they really don't care to know the true answer.

We are taught to always keep it in. Sharing our true emotions are weak and show that we are attention hungry. Here is my question...Is it really that horrible to need attention every once in awhile? Would it really hurt to ask that question and actually want to hear the answer?

I spend a lot of time asking my daughters how they are doing. We spend a lot of time talking about feelings and how something made them feel. In a house with 5 girls in the years to come it will turn into hours of talks about feelings, but well worth it in the end.

I have taught them that if they ask "How are you doing?" that they better want to hear the truth, otherwise they shouldn't ask. I have also taught them that answering with "Fine" when they really aren't is not being truthful and in reality is a lie.

Think about this for a second...What kind of a difference could you make in your child's life if you actually took them and taught them the opposite of what society does? People really do care! People really want to know how you are doing! I want to know how you are...do not gloss it over. You are not small and insignificant...You are largely important!

Day 14...
Coffee Bean Hearts

I carved hearts on the coffee beans, but the funny thing is...my daughter ended up having a heart in her skin. We, and by that I mean all the girls and I, have really bad skin in the winter. Dry, peeling and just down right icky. But apparently peeling skin can sometimes become art!

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Tomorrow...use a dollar bill as your medium.
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Sunday, January 13, 2013

Voids in the Heart - Day 13

I remember this one day I was walking down the ramp that goes into the basement of our college admin building. I was in a dark place and had been since I arrived at college. It seemed as if my world was caving in on me. I couldn't point out specifically what was causing this, but it was something...maybe it was everything.

This is when he stopped me. It was a teacher. He kind of passed me and then turned around and said "Get over it. People have it much worse in the world. Go to Calcutta!" Then he left. It was fast. It was painful. It was truth. Sometimes the truth stings. 

I was mad! I stormed back to my desk at work and I had every intention of emailing him. I started to type out my email. Letting him know that he had no idea what he is talking about. That he doesn't know what I am going through...

I stopped. I realized that at this moment I couldn't really put my finger on what what causing all my pain either. I had given up my past problems to God. I suppose to be using a fresh start, but the truth was...I was holding onto sadness and hurt because those were the feelings I had come to know. Joy. That's what I needed, but it seemed so far away. 

I was living life walking up a mountain. Trying to attain something I knew I would never be able to get. I was striving for perfection. I would never get there. It was these very simple words spoken to me that made me wonder...what am I striving for? Why am I striving for it? 

I closed the email and never sent it. Years later I sent him a message on Facebook telling him thank you for listening to God. It made a big shift in my life that day. I laid down this trek for perfection I had. There have been moments it tries to sneak back in, but I remember the relentless grace and tenderness of Jesus and I step back into the joy given to me. 

It was starting today's project that made me think of this moment in my life. I sat down with glue and tea leaves and started to create. The Inquisitor was watching me and she asked "Why does it have missing pieces?" So I told her that sometimes people feel like they are missing something in their heart. So of course she asks "What makes them miss parts of their heart?"

Good question little one. Sometimes it's a little thing. A boy. Someone saying something mean. Death of a loved one. But then sometimes all these things can just build up and it's like you have forgotten why you were so unhappy. One thing on top of the other. You keep trying to climb on top of it all to get from under it. When then you finally realize what you have to do is give it all over. Stop holding on. Stop striving...and just give it over to God.

Messed Up Heart

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Saturday, January 12, 2013

He Stole It...Day 12

This man stole my heart. He made me melt with his funny comments and loving ways. There have been times I have sabotaged the relationship. Times I thought I wasn't worth it. I'm not good enough. I'm used. Beat up and broken. How could he really love me? I don't deserve his love.

There are times when I have this same attitude towards God. Truth is I don't deserve his love, but he wants to give it to me. I don't deserve his goodness, but he gives me his grace. Time and time again I am reminded of Hosea. Married to a prostitute who continued to be unfaithful, and every time he went out and brought her back. Loved her. Never reminded her of how horrible she was. Never told her how worthless she was. He brought her back as his wife, wiping the slate clean. Showing her a love that she could never earn, because that's what it's about.

We are given a love that we can never earn. There are not enough good things we could do to earn the love of God, but it's given to us. It's a gift of grace. And this is so unfathomable...but I have come to accept it.

I am like Gomer. A woman who couldn't understand such great love. A woman who lived a life and came to believe that she was almost unlovable. Every step of the way her husband showing her love and at the same time he was able to demonstrate a bit of God's love. My husband has helped me understand so much about myself. Understand so much about relationships. Helped me understand so much about God. He inspires me and pushes me to dig deeper.

Day 12...
The Heart That Melts 

A heart that disappears into it's background. There is more than one heart in this picture. You can kind of see them...but they also blend. Our oldest helped me take this picture.

Go to...
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Friday, January 11, 2013

When i am Weak...Then I am Strong - Day 11

Welcome to the FRIDAY LINK UP! Today you are suppose to use your non dominant hand. Pick whatever medium you are most comfortable with and use your left hand if you normally use your right...and vise-versa. I quickly asked my husband how I would do that taking a picture...and he told me that was cheating. So I choose something else. I did everything with my left hand...and it was HARD! But I think it turned out pretty good. It's not completely finished but here it is.


Day 11...

As I was getting this together I thought "How am I going to do this? I can't do anything with my left hand!" Seriously I have thought about this before. What if something happened to my right hand? I would be in big trouble because I wouldn't know how to do anything. My left hand is so awkward!

But then I thought about 2 Corinthians 12:9-10 "But he said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.' Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. For the sake of Christ, the, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong."

I remember when I fought this verse. I fought it so hard. I wanted to be strong. I wanted to do it all on my own. But I got to a point where I gave in and realized that if I didn't accept the fact that I was weak and needed God I wasn't going to go anywhere. In my weakness He showed me His grace. I was brought to tears last night seeing how God's grace can change a persons life. How in our weakness we are made strong. Of all things it was Les Miserables that caused tears. But I felt as if there have been times in my life when I was Jean Valjean. I had been there in the dark, lonely place of my weakness. Then God reached down to that place and used my weakness to show His glory. When I am weak then I am strong.

Go to...
Day 1 to link up with the fun.
Don't forget to link up today!

Tomorrow...Camouflage. Create or alter something so that it disappears into it's background.


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Thursday, January 10, 2013

Not Home...Day 10

I've always had this feeling of not feeling at home. Everywhere I live I always think the feeling will get better once I get to the next place. There was always this feeling of wanting to be some place else, but even when I would get there the feeling never left. It took years to figure out what the actual problem was.

I'm not home. There is no place here on this Earth that is home. Today I heard this song in my car that really speaks that whole idea so well. I remember the first time I heard it...my oldest daughter was singing it. 7 years old and she was singing a song that really made me understand why I felt the way I did, and helped me get to a place of accepting and being ok with not being content here.





I have this blessed assurance  holding me. 
All I know is I'm not home yet
This is not where I belong
Take this world and give me Jesus
This is not where I belong.

I've always known the verse that talks about how we are aliens to this world. Always understood that at some point I would go home to heaven. But finally getting it that I didn't belong here. There would be moments when people didn't get me. That I would not be content here...that all took away. Being ok with that feeling has made my struggles with life easier. 

Day 10...
Cover of Art Journal

This is an on going project...but I took my book and I am making something new. Right now I just have the cover done, but there will be more to come! 

Go to...
Day 1- To join in on the fun of creating for a year.
Come back tomorrow join the Friday Link UP!



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Wednesday, January 9, 2013

You Want What?? - Day 9

Today was making something out of breakfast before you eat it. If any of you have read before we have a rule in our house that we don't play with our food. This rule is mostly for me...to ease my mind. I know how I use to play with my food, but it wasn't to make it fun and pretty. It was to make it look as if I had actually eaten when I hadn't.

I talked it through with my husband and told him how I was feeling about it. We came to the conclusion that if I made breakfast on the plate to fit in my project and then served it that way it wasn't playing with food. It's just how food was going to be served. I think having rules at the meal tables is a good idea, but I also think having a good support person to talk through your thoughts with is awesome!

So thanks to my husband here is Day 9...

Heart Flower Egg Bake

Go to...
Day 1 to be a part of the year of creating.
Day 4 to link up on last Fridays LINK UP!
Don't forget we will have a new link up every Friday!

Tomorrow transform an old book into something new!

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On a side note, my morning did not go as planned! Because my husband is on strange hours right now everyone had to stay up till past 9 because we had to go pick up my oldest from her Tae Kwon Do class. Normally it gets done a little past 8, but we were still waiting in the van around 8:45, and then she finally came out! The night was crazy, and I really appreciate my husband being home for bed time. Makes it go so much smoother. Early morning our second oldest made her way to our bed. I calmed her down (She most likely had a bad dream) and I went back to sleep. My husband looked at the alarm clock and said "Honey it's 7:20." Well there went my plans for breakfast for all of us. I quickly had the thought that I would just keep everyone home for the day, but then The Diva woke up and the ones who do go to school quickly got ready. We finally got to breakfast and I got to my coffee! Looking forward to my husband being back on his regular hours again!
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Tuesday, January 8, 2013

A Husband...A Father - Day 8

My husband is an important part of my healing and recovery. He is a rock for me and shows love for me. It reminds me of Ephesians 5:25 "Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her." When I have my moments. When I had dark days he doesn't hold that against me. He reminds me of his love for me. My husband and I are made 1. We are woven together in marriage and love. No matter what comes our way our bond in marriage, in Christ, keeps us together.

His the father to our girls. He's an important part of prevention in their life. He's hands on, soft spoken and tender with correction. He's the favorite...most of the time. Reading books, playing games, watching movies and eating meals. Those are all things he does with the girls. At times they seem like little things. Unimportant. But they are so important and are things the girls will remember forever.

Husbands....Dads...Please remember how important you are to your wives and children...

Day 8...
S&D Heart



Go to...
Day 1 to link up and join the year of creating.
Day 4 to link up to Friday's Creative Link UP

Tomorrow does not sound wonderful to me...but I will try it. Make something out of your breakfast before you eat it.
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