Tuesday, March 11, 2014

My Life of Want

I live a life of want in a world of no needs. I reach out and within my grasps I have all that I need...and more. Yet I want. I walk in the stores and I want what I see. I feel a deep need to have things. I fill my house as if this will help my feelings of want go away. But...they only grow stronger.

I desperately want to rid my life of the feelings of want. They make me feel guilty and jealous all at the same time. It's emotions like this that try to tear your heart into tiny bits. While your mind races time is wasted. I finally throw my hands up in the air and give up...

The issue is not that wanting something is bad. It's not that I should try to stop wanting, but it's what I am wanting that shows where my focus is. Shows where my heart is. I want to newest fashion trend. I want the biggest T.V. I want the fittest body. The cutest hairstyle. I want. I want. I want...My focus is on things. It's on material and physical possessions. What good are they to me?

God made me a wanting person. He formed me to long for something. But it's not all the stuff in the world that I should long for. It's Him. I long to be satisfied and rest is found in His arms.

When I start to want more of Him, my wants become His wants. He begins to show me something more than just what is sitting right in front of me. He opens my limited mind to a world that is much greater and larger than this little town I live in. I begin to feel the ache for those who have less. I feel the pain of their want. Their want...that is a need.

They want their next meal. They want clean water. They want education. They want clean clothes. They want a home. I see their wants that are easily provided to me. I see their wants as a need. And my wants that I once had are no longer. My wants have now become a want to see their needs fulfilled.

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