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Sunday, July 6, 2014

I Love Food Too Much...

I was sitting in the grocery line when a stranger made a comment on the health factor of my food. I gave her a nice smile and commented on the fact that my girls love their fruits and veggies. Her next comment struck up quite the conversation...one I don't think she was expecting.

"I have a horrible time dieting. I really wish I could be anorexic, but I just love food too much."

I think she expected another polite smile from me, or perhaps a nod of agreement, because really wasn't her idea fantastic? But in all honesty, being anorexic is not a joke and it's not something to wish for. If I could go back in time and talk to little 8 year old Sadie I would tell her about the darkness her older self's mind can bring on. How if she just reached out for help it could all be avoided.

To be honest it's not that I didn't love food enough, because there were times when I would have given anything for my mind to just let me have a bit of an apple. And yet I punished myself for something that was not even my fault. Your love for food is hidden behind your deep fear of failure.

Anorexia is perhaps a choice I once made, but not knowing the consequences and not in my right mind. This is not a path I would choose for anyone. I look back at my past and I am thankful that my experiences have given me the opportunity to help others, but I wish I would have these opportunities without having to go through darkness.

My once darkness compels me to find a future for others, that is only filled with light. This is the future I want for my daughters. This is the future I want for all young people. So no...don't wish you could be anorexic. Don't wish for something that will only complicate and fill your life with confusion. Instead be happy with healthy...even if that doesn't include perfection.


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2 comments:

  1. I have a niece who has been through anorexia as well. She seems to be well, now, and I hope she stays that way. I'm sure she would agree with you that it is not something to wish for!

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  2. I was always big for my age until early teens then I just got what I thought was heavy.I was very self conscious and shy thinking everyone saw a fat girl. Suddenly, at 15, I could hardly eat a thing....I still do not believe it was a conscious effort..... I just could not keep food down. Even water was hard to keep in my stomach. They did not have a name for it back then. I became aware of how "small" I was getting but still thought "fat" until about 20 when I became pregnant. At which time I finally started putting on weight. I made an effort to eat healthy because of having children, knowing they needed to be as healthy as possible and I was in charge of that. I struggled throughout my 20's, 30's and early 40's with society's delusion of body image. Too many people and particularly young girls cannot meet that expectation. We must simply teach them to be healthy both physically with their eating habits and mentally with their acceptance of themselves. People come in all shapes, sizes and colors, if we did not, life could get pretty monotonous.We may not all be 5'6" and 115 lbs.but we can learn to be healthy and happy with who we are and it starts at a very young age with good eating habits, exercise and a real perspective of who we are not a superficial one perpetrated by corporation advertising and the Hollywood pretense of "beautiful people".

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