I was sitting in the grocery line when a stranger made a comment on the health factor of my food. I gave her a nice smile and commented on the fact that my girls love their fruits and veggies. Her next comment struck up quite the conversation...one I don't think she was expecting.
"I have a horrible time dieting. I really wish I could be anorexic, but I just love food too much."
I think she expected another polite smile from me, or perhaps a nod of agreement, because really wasn't her idea fantastic? But in all honesty, being anorexic is not a joke and it's not something to wish for. If I could go back in time and talk to little 8 year old Sadie I would tell her about the darkness her older self's mind can bring on. How if she just reached out for help it could all be avoided.
To be honest it's not that I didn't love food enough, because there were times when I would have given anything for my mind to just let me have a bit of an apple. And yet I punished myself for something that was not even my fault. Your love for food is hidden behind your deep fear of failure.
Anorexia is perhaps a choice I once made, but not knowing the consequences and not in my right mind. This is not a path I would choose for anyone. I look back at my past and I am thankful that my experiences have given me the opportunity to help others, but I wish I would have these opportunities without having to go through darkness.
My once darkness compels me to find a future for others, that is only filled with light. This is the future I want for my daughters. This is the future I want for all young people. So no...don't wish you could be anorexic. Don't wish for something that will only complicate and fill your life with confusion. Instead be happy with healthy...even if that doesn't include perfection.